The Secret To Success
In pursuit of The Secret To Success, we have all set goals at some time in our lives, both small and large goals. It may have happened after a drinking session, on New Year’s Eve or after facing a difficult situation in life or just on the spur of the moment. Unfortunately, the majority of our population give up when sobriety returns or when they start to trip over life obstacles. People simply do not want to make sacrifices to accomplish their goals. They do not have the time to follow through, especially when time becomes limited. And this is simply because they do not understand how to set goals in the first place.
Goal setting is a process that requires consideration of what you truly and seriously want and finding as many reasons as possible to go for it. Once you get this part right, it becomes easier to define what steps you need to take to get to the end of your journey. Remember, we all have dreams of improving the quality of our lives. For some people, it may be earning more at work or getting promoted. For others, it could be graduating from university or setting up their own business.
Whatever the reason, you all deserve to be happy, to feel good about yourself. Here are seven steps to help you accomplish your goals. I give you The Secret To Success.
The Secret To Success – [Step 1] Acquire What Your Desire
Ask yourself what you truly want in life. Even though it sounds trivial, most people do not know how they would like to shape their destiny. As a result, they end up climbing the wrong ladder, which only leads to frustration, dissatisfaction and even depression.
In order to make sure you have chosen what you truly desire, ask yourself why it is important for you to achieve this particular goal. Does it make your heart beat faster with excitement? Does it arouse the feeling of happiness and fulfillment?
Visualize yourself having already achieved the goal and deeply analyze the accompanying feelings. This is when you know whether what you want is what you truly desire.
I have a friend who graduated in the field of medicine just because her parents had expected her to become a doctor. Her parents wanted fame and respect. They wanted to stroke their self-esteem. Unfortunately, my friend complied diligently without stopping to think of her well-being. Externally, she has been an outstanding, prosperous doctor for the past twenty years. However, internally, she is a mental wreck and still struggling to find fulfillment.
It occurred that she had always wanted to get into photography, but had re-prioritized her plans to suit her parents.
The Secret To Success – [Step 2] – Believe and Achieve
I always go back to what Henry Ford said:
“If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.”
This is called a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you appeal to your brain for something on a continual basis and with conviction, you simply get it. If you question your ability to achieve your goal, your brain will come up with many reasons why you should fail. The subconscious mind will search its database for past situations when you were incompetent and lacking confidence and failure is inevitable.
On the other hand, if you truly believe you can achieve your goal, your subconscious mind will recall the times when you were confident, relentless and unbeatable. These are the resources that will give you the courage and discipline to tackle your goals. These are the resources that trigger success.
Whenever I face a difficult task at work, I refer to the times when I conquered formidable obstacles. I pep talk myself until I gain faith. Of course, it is important to set goals that are realistic in order to make you believe in your ability.
For example, if you earn 60,000 dollars per year, do not aim for a pay raise of over 30 % of your present salary. If you weigh 150 kilograms in May, you simply cannot lose 50 kilos before going on your Summer vacation in August. This is unrealistic and you are setting up yourself for disaster. When this happens, it becomes difficult to get a grip of yourself and try again.
So remember, be realistic and you will reach your target. This will double your confidence and self-esteem and allow you to aim for bigger, more challenging goals.
The Secret To Success – [Step 3] – Be Specific
You do not get what you want by having a vague idea of your goal. In project management, vague requirements lead to confusion and misfortune. For example, it is not enough to say, “I have to clean up the mess in the shed.”
First of all, the verb “have to” or “must” is an obligation and commitments are perceived as pain by the brain. There is no way you will convince the brain to move towards pain. We need to replace this with “want”, which is more connected with pleasure. In addition, motivation is born when a concrete time factor is defined. If you do not specify when you want to finish a task, you will keep procrastinating.
The above goal should be redefined as, “I want to tidy up my shed by tomorrow evening.” In order to gain enthusiasm and motivation, envision how good you would feel upon its accomplishment.
Do you want to lose weight? Your specific goal would be, “I weigh x kilograms by 31 December, 2016. Once again, go on to visualize yourself weighing x kilograms and truly feel the pleasure and happiness related to its achievement.
It is vital for us to understand that we are governed by the brain. If we interact correctly with the brain, we can conquer almost any obstacles and achieve what we desire. You can tend towards being more specific, more precise by writing down your goals. As you write, you become more creative and the goal becomes clear.
The Secret To Success – [Step 4] – Identify Obstacles
Obstacles will surely appear on your path to success.
Most people treat them as a good pretext to put their tails between their legs and back off. Remember, if you run away today, you will keep running in the future. In this way, you will never achieve happiness and peace of mind.
If you have clearly defined your goal, you should be in a position to predict what obstacles might hinder your progress. By thinking of this in advance, you have ample time to figure out what steps you would have to take to overcome them.
Furthermore, your brain gets acquainted with the situation and will react in a better way if the obstacles do eventually appear. Knowing what you can do in a worst case scenario allows you to move forward with determination.
When I decided to study medicine in a foreign language, I anticipated the handicaps and had something up my sleeve just in case. This is what drove me towards my goal. I was knocked down many times, but I kept moving on with blind diligence. Once the brain is pre-prepared for drawbacks, you will find the energy, courage and perseverance to keep going when the going gets tough.
Interestingly, the majority of obstacles that appear on the road to success are our own internal obstacles, related to our personality. When you look at yourself in the mirror, you may see your biggest friend or biggest enemy. Get a grip of your inner self and it becomes easier to deal with the external issues.
The Secret To Success – [Step 5] – Align Your Goals
Personal values are related to the intangible things that are of fundamental importance to us. Our values guide us and dictate how we behave and react in different situations. One of the reasons why people fail to achieve success is because their goals and personal values are out of alignment.
If you are a sales representative and you goal is to double your commission, then you would have to enlarge your sales territory, travel more frequently and spend more time at restaurants to preserve your relationship with clients.
However, if your top personal value is the belief that the relationship with your family is of great importance, then there is a conflict between your goal and your values. Your goal is dragging you in one direction, but at the same time your belief is forcing you to spend more time with your family.
You find yourself in a permanent emotional conflict, which will have a negative impact on your performance at work. It is therefore wise to take some time to recognize your values before setting goals. Once they are in agreement, you are on your way to achieving what you desire.
The Secret To Success – [Step 6] – Visualization
Visualization is a technique that is used by successful sportspeople to get the best out of the mind. A properly-managed mind results in success. A mismanaged-mind leads to mental turmoil and mediocrity.
Make it a habit to envision in your mind’s eye that you have already reached your goal. Feel the pleasure related to your goal. Visual your accomplished goal just before going to bed, just after waking up in the morning and as many times as possible during the day. Make you brain satiated with these images and feelings and it will become more receptive. You become focused. You become motivated and you begin to notice possibilities and opportunities that will take you to your goal.
Do you want to lose weight? See yourself looking slimmer and healthier. Remember, whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.
Do you want to that dream car of yours? Implant images of the dream car in your mind. See yourself driving the car and feel the satisfaction of doing so. Go to the car dealership, sit in the car and allow the good feeling to soak into your body and mind. Once you convince your mind that you already possess the car, it will seek and find ways for its attainment.
The Secret To Success – [Step 7] – Self-Flattery
Whenever I complete a milestone, I spend a few minutes congratulating myself on my performance. After that, I proclaim loudly to my family that I had just done a good job and then treat myself to a celebratory glass of red wine.
Self-flattery pushes me to acquire even more and reach the ultimate goal. It allows me to get up and press on when things go wrong.
Our brain tends towards pleasure and needs to be reminded that there is a reward for the work that has been executed. The reward is the positive reinforcement that keeps you motivated and increases your stickability.
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